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Friday, August 1,2008

Fruit Fascists

By Chuck Shepherd
The European Union allows fruits and vegetables to be sold only in prescribed sizes and colors. For instance, it has 35 pages of regulations governing 250 varieties of the apple, as well as rules that cucumbers must be straight and bananas curved.
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Wednesday, July 23,2008

Don’t Order the Turtle

By Chuck Shepherd
In May, Randall Popkes, 41, and his son Joshua Williams, 22, were arrested in West Des Moines, Iowa, and charged with attempted safecracking at the Des Moines Golf Country Club. A security officer noted their car’s license plate as they sped away after a frustrating session in which they cut into the safe but could not open it.
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Wednesday, July 16,2008

Bombs Away

By Chuck Shepherd
After languishing for two years in the Irish legislature, the Nuclear Test Ban Bill of 2006 was recently rethought and refurbished, according to a June report in the Irish Independent. Originally, the bill codified the U.N. Test Ban Treaty and added some provisions specific to Ireland...
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Wednesday, July 9,2008

Prepare for the Rapture

By Chuck Shepherd
A company called You’ve Been Left Behind LLC has begun offering an e-mail service to Christians who are preparing for the Rapture, in which all “true” Christians ascend to heaven to meet their Lord. The company, knowing that some Christians believe that the Rapture could occur suddenly, offers a way for customers to...
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Wednesday, July 2,2008

Your True Value

By Chuck Shepherd
In May, the minor league Calgary Vipers, of the inde pendent Golden Baseball League, traded pitcher John Odom to the Laredo Broncos of the independent United League. Originally, the trade was sup posed to bring another player, but the Broncos’ player balked at leaving the United States for a Canadian team...
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Wednesday, June 25,2008

Good Eating

By Chuck Shepherd
A prominent chef once wrote, “If you’re going to kill the animal, it seems only polite to use the whole thing,” and recently restaurants specializing in such “nose-to-tail” cuisine have opened in several cities, according to a May report in Toronto’s National Post. The hamburger at New York City’s Tasting Room includes cow heart, liver,...
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Wednesday, June 18,2008

For the Birds

By Chuck Shepherd
Given the rising costs of synthetic fertilizers and organic foods, the collection of bird droppings (for use as organic fertilizer) has intensified on 20 islands off the coast of Peru, where 12-inch-thick seabird guano coats the land. In the 19th century, China fought with Peru on the high seas for the right to mine the guano...
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Wednesday, June 11,2008

Recurring Themes

By Chuck Shepherd
In what would be a modern record for the lapse of time between a death and its notice, neighbors found the mummified body of a Croatian woman in her Zagreb apartment in May, and police said no one remembered seeing her alive after 1973. (A Croatian news organization said the last sighting was in 1967.)
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Wednesday, June 4,2008

Guantanamo Resort

By Chuck Shepherd
The U.S. military operates a beachfront site at the Guantanamo Bay detention facility where military personnel and their families can vacation. The resort offers air-conditioned suites, surfing, boat rides, a golf course, a bowling alley and even a gift shop. One T-shirt for sale reads, “The Taliban Towers at Guantanamo...
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Wednesday, May 28,2008

The Customer Isn’t Always Right

By Chuck Shepherd
In April, according to police in Fort Pierce, Fla., Amity Joy Doss, 24, grabbed a young McDonald’s employee by her shirt to emphasize her dissatisfaction with the service. Doss then asked the manager to fire the employee. Instead, the manager called police while Doss wandered outside, climbed a tree, hung upside down by bended...
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2009-01-08 7:30pm
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Live! Interactive! Improv Comedy For the Whole Family! Bring the kids, bring Grandma, heck, even bring the dog! Come see the longest running comedy Show in Milwaukee.
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Blogging Blue: Hardin removed from MPS ballot
As first reported by the Milwaukee Journal Sentinel, Charlene Hardin, a 12 year veteran of the Milwaukee School Board, has been removed from the February 17th primary ballot due to an insufficient number of signatures on her nominating paperwork (emphasis mine): Hardin needed 400 valid signatures to reach the ballot, Election [...]

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